Princeton alum, and former Class President (’77), Susan Patton has recently received some negative press due to a letter published in the Daily Princetonian, Princeton’s student newspaper. In the letter to the editor, Patton suggests that women should not be ashamed of looking for a spouse during their undergraduate years. She credits marital success to equality in intelligence, and argues that bright young women should seek out partners who can intellectually stimulate them and challenge them, if not they might become bored or annoyed with their spouses.
Critics slammed Patton and called her “shallow and one-dimensional.” Others accused her of not being a part of the modern world and praised her for never having daughters of her own. Amira Young even pointed out that after 27 years of marriage, Susan Patton is getting a divorce; discrediting her own advice that women should find a spouse while they’re young. Young points out the changes that young college graduates experience as they continue to develop personally and professionally, suggesting that waiting to choose a life partner might be a better course of action for many individuals.
Contrary to many of the critical responses, Christine B. Whelan suggests that women should put serious thought into the men they date. She points out that young-adults are encouraged to plan out every aspect of their professional life, setting goals and mapping out a course of how to reach those goals. Why, she asks, are individuals not encouraged to carefully pursue a spouse? Whelan points out that if you replace the word “marriage” with “career,” Patton’s letter becomes a very sensible bit of advice for any young collegian. If we encourage students to take such care in making professional decisions, shouldn’t we encourage them to really evaluate their personal decisions as well?
Studies suggest that college students are more successful in classes when they’re married rather than when they’re single. In a study of over 11,000 graduate students, spanning 20 years, Joseph Price found that married men were 75% more likely to finish their graduate program within four years than single men. Likewise, married women were 25% more likely to finish graduate school quickly than their single peers. Price attributes some of these findings to the drive that families provide. He was encouraged to finish his work and research in time to eat dinner with his family every night.
As professionals shouldn’t we encourage our students to develop professionally and personally? Not to say that we should suggest majors such as Education and Family Studies, that provide an easy course load during a student’s undergraduate career, we should definitely prepare students to succeed in a career they will enjoy. But we should also provide them with a safe place to explore the other aspects of life after college, which include starting a family.
Sources:Susan Patton
'Marriage' is Not a Dirty Word
Amira Young
Tying the Knot and Success in Graduate School
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